Jam; seventeen years old; Filipino; Southern California; Hollywood High School; awkward; crazy; loud; dramatic; straight-forward; and of course, amazingly retarded. LOOOL! WELCOME TO MY BLOG! :D



if u are scared or worried or stressed please just remember that even if you mess up super badly, doggies on the street will still tug on their owners when u walk by because they wanna say hello to u so badly

This is legitimately comforting.


"What does the chef recommend?"

"Sir, this is a mcdonalds"



sometimes i’ll have loads of money and then other times i’ll be awake



There’s a lovely old English myth that if someone who truely loved and trusted the werewolf called it by name that it would turn back to human.
Others include throwing their human clothes at it and it’d turn back but that’s a bit less romantic

Wait a fucking minute….
there’s one story that you call “a bit less romantic” which includes human clothes.
it is called Bishclavret
It was written in French by a woman named Marie de France.
And it is basically the best werewolf myth ever.
First off, homeboy Bishclavret was all like, “Yo babe, I love you babe 5evers.”
But his wife was a little bitch.
So she was like, “Where is your cheating ass going three days every  month? Hmmmmmmmmmm?”
Bishclavret was like, “Babe, I would never cheat on you. You is the apple of my eye. My bae. My everything. I share all the things with yo’se. Just BTW. I turn into a fucking werewolf every month.”
And she said to herself, “Homeboy got issues. I’m out.”
But before that He said, “Also, btw. I hide my clothes under this specific rock and I need them to turn back into a human.”
And she said to herself, ” Let’s fuck shit up.”
So she gets a handy-dandy Knight to steal Homeboy’s clothes. Then marries his ass.
Then Homeboy was hella depressed. And in wolf form 5ever.
But just happens to meet the king who’s like, ” You pretty fly for a wolf. You can join my posse”
So they go back to the castle and the King is like, “I love you. No homo. Maybe a little homo.”
Then one day, the Knight comes to the castle and Homeboy goes ape on his ass.
Everyone was like, “wtf?”
Then the King was like, “My homie don’t hurt anyone. This bitch ass must have done something to him.”
And everyone like  ”yea. 4 sho.”
so the King invites the Knight and the wife to the castle.
But Homeboy attacks the wife and rips her fucking nose off.
the King is like , “O-o.”
Then says, “We torturing yo ass for messing with Homeboy cause we ride together die together. And you messed with the wrong motherfuckin’ clique”
She then confesses that she was acting like a little bitch and returns the clothes.
Of all the fucking rooms to be in, Homeboy goes into the King’s bedroom and returns to his sexy self.
Then the king is like, “Hell yeah, I’m getting a piece of that booty 2night!”
And the wife and the Knight were banished and their future generations have no noses…..
Mic drop.
End of story.
What’s the worst thing I’ve stolen? Probably little pieces of other people’s lives. Where I’ve either wasted their time or hurt them in some way. That’s the worst thing you can steal, the time of other people. You just can’t get that back. Chester Bennington (via teenager90s)



no hemo

that was the best joke i’ve heard all month


seeing a sexy math major and making the first move like


(Source: surprisebitch)



*points to ur lap* is this seat taken